Frustration is something that stings and leave you wondering where it came from. There's no specific mark but a cascade of emotions. As for all of us, well maybe just me, but dealing with emotions gets overwhelming and scary. The thought that I am capable of expressing a color-wheel of emotions was very daunting. At times, I felt as if everyone around me just did not understand why I was taking a LONG few months to recover. Yes, everyone's body is different and healing process is different. Yet, I felt as if each day I wake up nothing has improved. In my head, I was giving explanations to everyone around me on why my ankle is the way it was. & that lead to more frustration within me. It was rough. I admit there were times I just did not have any motivation to wake up and crutch my way to class or even explain what happened to me. I gave in to everything that I told myself I would not do. Yup, that's when my frustration stirred up. The feeling of being a failure because I was disobedient or the feeling of being a failure because I lost track of my purpose. I was not sure which one was the mark of the sting.
through and through, I continue to embrace this color of frustration. I learn that I can't hide from what I am feeling. Yes, I always find happiness and find a reason to smile but that does not mean I can't experience any negative emotions. I can be define as a very joyful person but the main reason comes from embracing all the other aspects and choosing to be happy and to be filled with joy. At the end of the day, I know that Victory is won already. I know who resides in me and I am confident that He will bring me the comfort in the time of my need and show me who has done it all. There's no more hiding under the covers of my bed but constantly being clothe by His Grace.
